Tag: anger

Anger Management is Sometimes as Simple As Assertiveness Training

Written By: Michael Hecht, MFT A few hints which may make it easier for someone to manage their anger because it is often not about anger so much as simply being assertive in one’s relationships. I recently had a client who complained that she had difficulty controlling herself from getting into altercations or heated arguments…
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March 22, 2012 0

There is No Reality, Only Perception

“There is no reality—only perception.” Jay McGraw in Life Strategies for Teens “You don’t react to what happens to you (in this instance, someone saying “hi”), but you react to your interpretation of what happens to you (in this instance, how you interpret what that “hi” means). How you see and interpret certain events is…
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November 21, 2011 0

Disrespect

In anger management, the words “respect” and “disrespect” are heard often. Mostly it is about how someone else is disrespectful. So let’s think about what it means to be or feel disrespected. First, let’s define the term “Respect.” According to Dictionary.com, respect is defined as deference to a right, privilege, privileged position; proper acceptance or…
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October 7, 2011 0

Three Key Thoughts that can Defuse Anger Quickly

Sometimes it is hard to remember all the tips and remedies for defusing anger. When you experience a situation with someone that results in feeling upset, the following three principles are basic to dispelling and/or preventing anger from arising. 1. Think: This situation is not meant personally against me. This person is having a bad…
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October 7, 2011 0

Thought Triggers to Anger

Our thought patterns play a pertinent role with our feelings. Here are some triggering thoughts to anger. If you recognize some of them for yourself, it would be useful to contact an anger management counselor to help you.


September 1, 2011 0

Reacting versus Responding

Many people wonder how a situation escalates so quickly. Questions such as, “What happened?” or “How did he end up leaving?” are asked, yet there is not much success with finding a fulfilling answer.

When we react, we are emotionally charged. Responding rather than reacting requires for you to wait until you have cooled off, and worked through the issue, prior to replying to the situation. For example, if my supervisor criticizes me at work, I will feel angry and resentful, and I will act withdrawn (reacting). How I can respond is to recognize that my work does not have to be perfect, and that my supervisor was probably only trying to help me (responding).

If you are interested in learning more about reacting versus responding, you can contact one of our clinicians to work with you.


August 8, 2011 0

FOCUSING AS A PROCESS FOR ANGER RESOLUTION

Written by: Judith Morton Fraser MFT “I’ve started to notice how I make relentless judgments about people whom I don’t even know.” Phyllis said as she sat on the sofa in my office. “I want to slap the Gelson’s cashier for calling me sweetie. If the man upstairs doesn’t stop tap dancing on my ceiling…
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May 14, 2011 0

The “You”, The “Us”, and The “Me”- How Ignoring Yourself in a Relationship Can Lead to Anger

Did you know that there are three parts to a relationship? Relationships are made up of the “you”, the “us”, and the “me”. Many times people in relationships place the focus and the emphasis on the “you” or on the “us”. This means that they are constantly focused on what the other person needs or what…
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May 5, 2011 0

Feelings

Feelings are a normal part of the human experience. All human beings are born with the capability of feeling and thinking. Healthy individuals are able to use their reasoning (their thinking) to understand their feelings and decide how to respond to them. Individuals that grew up in a dysfunctional family, where emotions were not expressed…
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April 9, 2011 0

16 Ways to Reduce Stress

According to the American Psychological Association, stress in America is on the rise. In 2010, 73% of parents surveyed reported family “responsibilities” to be the number one reason for stress in their lives. Thirty-two percent of parents reported their individual stress to be extreme and rated their stress level an eight on a scale of…
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March 28, 2011 0