Premier Anger Management Site
  • facebook


Don’t hold onto anger, hurt, or pain. They steal your energy and keep you from love.” — Unknown

Considering the fact that this month is February, the month of love, I couldn’t think of a better time than now to discuss how to deepen in the love that you feel for both yourself and others.

Valentine’s Day is finally here, and while the focus is, of course, on romantic love, I encourage you to broaden your definition of the meaning of love. Let this day simply be a day of love, in ALL its forms. Whether you’re expressing your love with a spouse, a partner, family, friends, or even your pet (!), let your focus be on the way you show up in your world and the way you share your love with others.

One of the best ways to reconnect with your love is through the simple act of forgiveness. It’s tough to feel love when you’re stuck in a feeling of anger, resentment, hurt or pain. Therefore, why not use Valentine’s Day to release any anger you feel toward someone else (or even yourself)?

When you release the energy of anger, hurt, or pain, you’re essentially freeing up space inside, which allows you to connect more fully to the love that already resides within you.


Okay, so how do you release your anger and free up that space, you may ask? Well, one way is by writing a letter to someone who elicits negative emotions inside of you. Write the letter with the intention that this person never has to see it! That way, you can write whatever feelings come forward.

When you’re done, burn the letter, and say an affirmation such as, “I free myself from any anger or hurt that I feel or once felt toward this person. I wish him/her only love and joy.” Try this out, and see if you can experience your heart open, just a little bit more.


Anger will never disappear so long as thoughts of resentment are cherished in the mind. Anger will disappear just as soon as thoughts of resentment are forgotten.” —Buddha

The month of February may bring up many emotions for people. After all, it is the month that contains that either beloved or hated holiday we all know as….Valentine’s Day! Those of us in relationships may embrace the holiday of romantic love with open arms (or sometimes not!), while those of who are single may curse the holiday with a raised fist and anger in our hearts.

If you are feeling anger toward the holiday, toward others, or even toward yourself this month, take a break for a moment and remember to breathe! Most likely, you are feeling angry because of the thoughts and/or beliefs you are holding with regard to this time of month. Remember—negative thoughts lead to negative emotions.

For example, one reason you may be feeling angry is because you feel you should have a partner on Valentine’s Day, and if you don’t, you feel less worthy than others. If your thoughts are demanding that you should have a partner, begin by questioning them.

Is it really true that you absolutely must have a partner? Is it possible that now simply isn’t the time for a partner? Or, is it possible you’re simply not ready for a partner at this point in your life? Finally, consider that not having a partner now does not mean that this will always be the case.

In addition, is it true that you are less worthy if you don’t have a partner? Is it possible that having a partner has nothing to do with your own sense of worth? Could it be that your worth is completely intact regardless of any external circumstances, including a partner?

Once you begin questioning these irrational beliefs and replacing them with more rational ones, you will probably start to feel less emotionally charged. Once again—change your thoughts, and you can change your feelings!

Call to Action!

*Once this week, consider being your own partner by taking yourself out on a date. Yes, I’m serious. If you love nice restaurants and flowers, then go ahead and take yourself out to your favorite restaurant, and reward yourself with a beautiful bouquet of flowers afterward! Treating yourself the way you wish a partner would treat you is not only empowering, but it is also self-loving.